Dear Lauren,

As you start Kindergarten today I hope you will consider some of these things I wish I had known before I started school;

Paste tastes really bad.

If you learn to laugh at yourself it takes away a lot of power that you think people have over you.

Make a mess in art class. Never will you have so much good stuff to make a mess with.

Take the section on poetry seriously. Don't take any grade you ever get on a poem seriously. Math can be graded, poetry cannot.

Mix all your leftover lunch food on your plate at least one time. What's the worst they can do? Make you eat it? On second thought…

Sometimes being a leader means being alone. Being alone is way better than being with people that bring you down. Being comfortable with being alone is the greatest gift you can ever give yourself because then you will never feel like you have to be with bad people.

Don't judge anybody. You don't have any idea what they woke up to that morning and are going home to that night.

It is not cool to join in making fun of someone. It is very cool to stand up for someone who is being made fun of. You will be cool to that person for eternity.

Sometimes your favorite outfit will be dirty, torn, lost, or plain worn out. Always have a second favorite outfit that you are willing to promote.

Take PE very seriously. Don't take games seriously. Games are supposed to be fun, that's why they are called games. Take PE seriously because this is the only body you will be given for your whole life. You might want to figure out how to use it.

At some point they will put letters in your math. Don't be scared. Never will anybody in real life do this. You will never see The Gap advertise a sale like this, "3 Skirts @ X=$33.33, how much is one skirt?"

Sit up front. It is harder to fall asleep when you sit up front and the teacher will always assume you did your homework when you sit up front.

Treat school as an all you can eat buffet for your brain. People who do not feed their brains have brains that growl due to hunger pangs. Growling brains make for growling people. Full brains make for full people.

Most of all have fun! Life is what you make it. If you learn how to make school fun you will learn how to make life fun.

Love,

Dad

P.S. Take all the potty breaks that are offered because just one accident can haunt you for the next twelve years.